The urge to share every moment is too overwhelming.
What am I thinking ?
What are you thinking ?
Does anyone need to know ?
When I was a kid, I used to wonder what it would be like to know what everyone was thinking, from moment to moment. Now we know what it’s like, and is it that great ? Is the future you imagined as amazing as you imagined it to be? How can we imagine the future better for ourselves, given that we can’t erase what we already know?
Also, I’ve come to the conclusion that no one was lying when they said “planning is everything.” You can’t do this on a whim, because a whim is just a whim. Something has to come to a head, as it did with my typewriter collecting. I haven’t taken delivery of a typewriter for myself for at least 2 years, and that’s because I kicked my eBay habit. And I kicked my eBay habit because I didn’t have a smartphone at the time. Now, if occasionally I am asked to find a typewriter for a friend, I find that I can go and find one online and not feel that obsessive pull because I have a defined task. My search is focussed and deliberate: Olivetti Lettera 22/32 no more than £20. Externally applied constraints allow me to keep my head, and not lose my way down the rabbit hole.
So these days my personal typewriter hunting is entirely based in the real world of charity shops and junk shops and vintage stalls. The thrill and suspense is a mini adventure on foot, not a late night bleary red eyed waste of sleeping time. And I no longer care about the amazing machines I am missing out on. I am more than lucky with the ones I already have.
Now, back to deleting my Facebook account. Again.
Looking for the unlooked for
With my hands
And fingers in the wind
Chamomile has really tough stems, I discovered. I just happened to have a pair of nail scissors in my bag as I walked past these on the last hundred yards to the house. I didn’t make tea out of the flowers, I was drinking green Sencha. I’m past the age where you care what other people might think, seeing you snip weeds for a bouquet. They’re lovely little dabs of sunshine.
Here are the drafts I went through on the lettera 22